Myths and Misconceptions About Funerals

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Myths and Misconceptions About Funerals: Separating Fact from Fiction in the UK

Funerals, an integral part of human culture, are often surrounded by myths and misconceptions. These can create unnecessary stress during an already challenging time.

In this blog, we will address some of the most common myths and misconceptions about funerals and the funeral industry in the UK, providing clarity and peace of mind.

Myth 1: Funerals Must Be Expensive to show how much they were loved

One of the most pervasive myths is that funerals must be expensive. While funerals can be costly, they don’t have to be. Many people believe that higher expenses equate to better tributes, but this isn’t necessarily true. We offer a range of funeral options to suit different budgets, from simple, direct cremations to more elaborate personal services. It’s important to choose what best honours your loved one without financial strain. Your loved one would not want you to get into debt over having the best flowers or solid wood coffins (and neither would we!) Back in the day, funerals were always the same format: hearse, limousine, wood coffin and coffin spray of traditional type flowers, death notice in the local newspaper, wake for 30 people back in the venue (and it had to be in the same venue as Norma next door had it because it was a lovely spread). This was sadly in the times before crematorium costs alone were over £1,000 – now people want/have to find ways to cut back, without being made to feel cheap or unworthy. We can honestly say some of the best funerals we have carried out have been those where we used hand-made coffins covered in a favourite blanket or cardboard coffins painted by the family with their handprints, flowers out of their garden and those that are quite simply, family-led. So, shop around, find a funeral director that will let you do as much of it as you want to do, without charging you for the bits that you could quite easily, do yourself. We believe that a “good” funeral does not have to be an expensive funeral but simply one that will leave you feeling proud that you did your very best for your loved one.

Myth 2: Embalming is Legally Required

Contrary to popular belief, embalming is not legally required in the UK. Embalming is often suggested for viewings or if the body needs to be preserved for a longer period before the funeral. However, for many services, especially those conducted shortly after death, embalming is not necessary. Families should feel free to ask their funeral director about their options so always check with your chosen funeral director – embalming techniques are incredibly invasive and although it is a procedure that can make a big difference to how someone looks or preserving the body if the funeral is not taking place for a while due to family circumstances, it is an extra cost that is sometimes hidden and you have every right to question it if you did not ask for it.

Myth 3: Funerals Must Follow Religious Traditions

Another misconception is that funerals must adhere to religious traditions. While many people find comfort in religious ceremonies, funerals can be entirely secular or a mix of both religious and personal elements. Celebrations of life are becoming increasingly popular, focusing on the individual’s personality and achievements rather than religious rites. Whatever the person who died believed in, is what is best for them.

Myth 4: All Funerals Are the Same

Every funeral is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach. The misconception that all funerals follow a standard format can limit how people choose to commemorate their loved ones. Funerals can be tailored to reflect the deceased’s personality, interests, and values. From eco-friendly burials to themed ceremonies, the possibilities are vast.

Myth 5: Funerals Must Be Conducted by a Professional

Myth 6: Cremation Prevents Having a Memorial Service

A common myth is that cremation means you cannot have a memorial service. In reality, cremation does not limit how you can commemorate a loved one. Memorial services can be held before or after the cremation, and ashes can be kept, scattered, or placed in a memorial site, allowing for diverse forms of remembrance. It is quite common for families to separate the cremation or burial from the actual funeral/memorial service.

Myth 7: Pre-paid Funeral Plans Cover Everything

Prepaid funeral plans are designed to alleviate financial and planning burdens, but they do not always cover all expenses. It’s crucial to read the terms carefully and understand what is included. Often the small print will say that whilst funeral directors’ fees are covered, the costs of third party disbursements (such as Dr fee, crematorium fees and minister/celebrant fees) may not be covered in full, if there is a short fall then it will be down to the family to cover that cost, either after the funeral or upfront, depending on the funeral director. Always make sure any plan is purchased by a company that is FCA regulated so that your money is protected. NEVER pay a funeral director directly for a pre-paid plan unless the funeral company is authorised to sell their own pre-paid plans (such as Co-op or Dignity) If the company goes out of business or is sold to a chain, your money may not be secure. Always check the details to ensure you’re adequately prepared. If you are unsure if the company you wish to deal with is regulated then go onto the FCA website and enter their details.

Myth 8: The deceased are removed from the coffins before cremation

Not sure where this myth came from, but it is certainly one that some people assume is correct. It isn’t though. Once the coffin is sealed, prior to the funeral, it remains sealed. The whole coffin goes through the cremation process and the ashes that you collect afterwards, will include the cremated coffin. In fact, it is true that some staff working at crematoriums have never actually seen a dead body.

Myth 9: You Must Wear Black to a Funeral

Wearing black to funerals is a long-standing tradition, but it is not a requirement. Many families encourage attendees to wear bright colours or clothing themes that the deceased loved. This trend is growing as people seek to personalise funerals and make them a true reflection of the individual’s life.

Myth 10: Children Should Not Attend Funerals

There is a common belief that children should be shielded from funerals. However, including children in the process can help them understand and cope with loss. Age-appropriate explanations and support can make the experience a meaningful part of their grieving process. Whether or not to include children should depend on the child’s maturity and the family’s comfort level.

Conclusion

Understanding the facts about funerals can ease the planning process and help families make informed decisions that honour their loved ones. The funeral industry in the UK offers a wide array of options, and knowing the truth behind common myths can ensure a respectful and personal farewell. We are always happy to help you explore all available choices and create a fitting tribute for your loved one.